Tag Archive for: executive coach

self-worth

What Working Hard May Tell You About Your Self-Worth

self-worth

Listen to the full podcast episode to learn about the science-backed practice that has not only changed my life but also the lives of countless people over the last two decades. This is something you can’t ignore if you want to achieve that great goal you identified for this year and write your new future.

I’m going in deeper than I have in the past on a topic I haven’t really covered before—self-worth. 

In part, it has to do with a conversation from a previous Playing Full Out podcast episode devoted to why we overwork. It’s called How to Work Less Without the Worry. 

I heard from many of you who had more questions and said you really resonated with  the topic. That you’ve accomplished a lot in so many ways, but continue to struggle with being able to stop working so hard or to slow down and enjoy what you’ve already created and achieved. That no matter what you have accomplished it never feels like it’s enough which makes it hard to ever shake the push to work harder, accomplish, and hustle more.

One business owner shared that he thought when he reached a certain level that he’d finally feel satisfied, but that something is still missing. 

He said he’d give anything to be able to enjoy more of his accomplishments — but that he always seems to be chasing something more.

I completely understand. It’s something I learned about myself for the first time a long time ago that explained so much of my dissatisfaction and my compulsion to hustle—even after I had achieved something that I thought would give me the feeling that I was missing. 

It had everything to do with a belief in my self-worth, which is the topic of this episode.

Many years ago, I walked into the office of an individual who I was hoping would help me identify a more satisfying career.  I left with what I thought was an unusual assignment. My homework was to embrace the belief that I am worthy of unconditional love. 

The woman said, “Understand that you don’t have to accomplish another thing in order to be worthy.” 

That felt incredibly uncomfortable. And while it was nice, I didn’t see what that had to do with me identifying a fulfilling career. What I hadn’t seen was that most of my life, I believed that if I only accomplished and achieved enough, then I would be enough. I would feel worthy. 

I hadn’t seen that I was always being driven by this deep belief that my worth was directly correlated to my accomplishments. 

It was this belief that kept me hustling and working hard to achieve more. Because I figured if I pleased enough people, if I accumulated the things that most considered representations of success and if I got enough validation and recognition, that I’d finally feel those feelings of fulfillment that I was yearning for. 

I hadn’t seen that this was at the root of what was driving me to spend long hours working 3 jobs, working out constantly, perfecting my work, pleasing my bosses along with my family, and friends — and never feeling real satisfaction. 

But these beliefs didn’t then—and still don’t—foster fulfillment because they aren’t true at all. 

These beliefs are based on a lie. The lie that we have to achieve and work hard and do more in order to be worthy. 

It made sense why it was so uncomfortable for me to slow down and enjoy what was in front of me.

Since then I’ve spent a lot of my professional life with incredibly successful people on the outside. But whether they’ve had career or financial success—it never felt like it was enough. 

So they did the only thing they knew—the only thing they’d ever been taught—they worked harder.

Hear me out. No one has ever come to me and said they have a self-worth problem. 

We have relationship problems, business problems, health problems, and career problems. 

Self-worth is not one of them. 

But Jamie Kern Lima in her book, Worthy, shares the numbers struggling with worthiness issues and they might surprise you.

  • 90% of women struggle with not feeling enough. 
  • 73% of female executives battle with imposter syndrome. 

And before you think it’s just a female issue, note that the numbers for men are almost the same.

  • 70% of men feel inadequate. 

These numbers are staggering as well as sad because not feeling worthy prevents us from sharing our brilliance. And we never feel truly satisfied. 

How do you know whether self-worth may be at the root of your current problem?  If you struggle with: 

  • walking into a meeting 
  • asking for what you want 
  • speaking what you think
  • promoting yourself
  • stagnating on accomplishing an important milestone or
  • holding a boundary to work less

…these are all signs that you may need to start with looking at the faulty belief of “I am not worthy enough.”

We often believe we need more confidence, or new tactics or techniques, but—self-confidence is an external experience, while self-worth is an internal matter. 

Trying to feel fulfilled by accomplishing more, will simply not work. It’s like threading a needle while you’re wearing boxing gloves. It’s absolutely impossible. 

While achievement can make you feel a lot of things—empowered, more self-confident, stronger—it will never make you feel worthy.

I am sure you—just as I didn’t—don’t think there’s a self-worth issue.

It had never occurred to me that my feelings of not believing I was enough could resolve my  external problems of working too hard, not liking the career I was pursuing or my financial situation — but it did.

If you’re in a career that is wonderful or looks good by external measures, but… you don’t feel worthy of having it, then you’re not going to show up at your highest levels of capacity or ability or talent. 

We can achieve all the things that make us look like a success, but if we don’t have the feeling or identity of someone who is worthy of that success—exactly as we are, without doing another thing or without anything else—then we can achieve all those things, but we’re never really going to feel fulfilled.

I’ve learned that people can gain more self-confidence and move through their failures, have higher performance, achieve big milestones, but if they haven’t learned how to increase their belief that they are worthy, they’re never really going to feel the satisfaction and fulfillment they are yearning for. 

Many of us are realizing that despite having accomplished all the things that we thought would make us feel fulfilled or satisfied, that we’re still missing the feeling of internal satisfaction. 

The biggest costs to those in a position of leadership when they don’t feel worthy enough or are dealing with imposter syndrome are how it hinders decision making abilities, leads to self-sabotage, and keeps us individuals stuck in hustle mode. 

Our cultural conditioning trained us that we must hustle for our worth.  

But the truth is we’ve been worthy since the day we were born.

Understand that just by existing—no matter what socioeconomic level, title, or what you’ve accomplished—You Are Worthy. 

The reality is that I still work on cultivating my own self-worth everyday. I can see when I’m stagnating on important decisions or not showing up fully. 

But as I have thoughts that I’m supposed to get approval from others or when I’m not accepting a challenge—it’s then that I take a breath and use the very tools I encourage my clients to use. 

When you find yourself not feeling worthy, do this exercise

Notice those times when you’re stagnating, overthinking, stalling, or maybe even changing who you are to get approval.

Then write out what I call a Worthy List. 

Start by writing the things you’re not doing, or feeling, or experiencing. And then in front of it, write “I am worthy to.” 

For example:

    • I am worthy to rest.
    • I am worthy to take a vacation.
    • I am worthy to make a career change.
    • I am worthy to not take on that project.
    • I am worthy to love myself exactly as I am.
    • I am worthy to say “no thank you” to the invitation or 
    • I am worthy to say “no more” to the work I don’t like

When you feel worthy of the role you are in or what you have, it doesn’t mean you stop pursuing your goals or dreams—it means you don’t pursue them with the belief that they’re going to make you feel fulfilled. 

What you want is when you do achieve these things, you’re able to enjoy them. And if you don’t achieve them, you feel worthy regardless! 

That is the “there” so many high-achievers are pursuing. It’s the feeling of internal peace, satisfaction and fulfillment regardless of what level of success we’ve hit or what anyone else thinks.

The great news is that you can learn to feel worthy.  

And when you learn to feel that you are enough, it will allow you to stop working so hard and hustling to achieve because you’ll realize it already exists within you. You’ve had it all along.

In this episode, I share:

  • How not feeling worthy negatively can affect your business, career, health, and relationships
  • Signs to spot feelings of unworthiness 
  • A quick exercise in the journey of learning to feel worthy

Resources and related episodes:

Subscribe on Apple Podcasts for more tips, tools, and inspiration to lead the optimal vision of your life, love, and leadership. Remember, a half version of you is not enough. The world needs the fullest version of you at play.

Listen on Apple Podcasts

___

About Rita Hyland

With over 20 years of experience as an executive and leadership coach, Rita helps leaders — emerging and established — excel in corporate and entrepreneurial environments.

Rita believes if leaders were more clear about how transformation really works and more intentional about creating what they want, their impact, success, and influence in the world would be unstoppable.

Through her coaching programs, private coaching, and masterminds, Rita shows leaders how to win consistently and create the impact and legacy they desire.

Central to Rita’s work is the understanding that you will never outperform your current programming, no matter how strong your willpower.

When you learn to use Rita’s proprietary Neuroleadership Growth Code, a technology that uses the best of neuroscience and transformational psychology to hit the brain’s buttons for change, YOU become both the solution and the strategy.

Her mission is to end talented, hard-working, and self-aware leaders spending another day stuck in self-doubt or confusion and not contributing their brilliant work and talent the world so desperately needs.

How To Overcome Your Resistance To Work Less

Listen to the full podcast episode to learn about the science-backed practice that has not only changed my life but also the lives of countless people over the last two decades. This is something you can’t ignore if you want to achieve that great goal you identified for this year and write your new future.

Do you have a deep desire to work less but find it difficult despite how much you want to? 

You’ve heard the solutions:

  • delegate more
  • hire more people
  • get better technology or a smarter time management system

Any of these ideas can work temporarily. 

But what happens when you get the additional resources, or you finish the project, and you still find that you are working more than you want? 

Many of today’s driven high performers want to work less — and worry less when they do.  So why is it so difficult? 

There are 3 motivations that may keep you working hard instead of slowing down no matter how hard you try to make the change.

To break the pattern we have to accurately identify our true motivation or the problem will persist. 

Too often we attempt to solve this problem of working less with the wrong prescription. Then we get more critical of ourselves when we fail.

Even worse is we unwittingly teach the next generation to operate in the same manner — never slowing down — while also being absent from them.

It’s not your fault if you’ve gotten here. It is, however, your responsibility to change it.

 

Let’s look at the real reasons we have such a hard time working less without worry. It has everything to do with understanding our motivations.

The 3 motivating factors:

  • A deep desire for approval. Is your worth dependent on what you do?

Many of us believe our work validates our worth. And our culture has perpetuated the conditioning that we’re as good as our last accomplishment. 

I had a client tell me that his organization regularly states, “Remember, you’re only as worthy as your last result.”

This cultural conditioning starts when we are children. We learn that when we achieve, we receive praise and rewards. We  learn our value correlates with our accomplishments or achievements.

I was constantly overworked in my earlier days, attempting to please and perform for everyone. And it wasn’t until I was on short-term disability at a very young age that I realized it was a result of my belief that my worth was dependent on what I did. 

My unrelenting internal pressure to achieve, get approval, and feel worthy was what prevented me from working less. It took a breakdown of my body for me to see this.

  • A desire to feel in control

We can slow down and work less, which means we’re turning over control. Or so we think. We tell ourselves that others aren’t as capable as we are.  That they can’t do it as well as us. Then we prove it to be true by not asking, empowering or adequately training those who could help us.  

We don’t just fear everything will be out of control if we work less and we don’t have control. We also feel that if we don’t control, that might mean that another person becomes in control of us. 

Control can be a big motivator and the reason we won’t work less. When we feel a need to be in control and conquer, we can be assured we are going in the wrong direction.

  • A wanting to feel safe

We could lose things and that makes us not feel safe. We get worried that we’ll lose clients, that our companies won’t run as efficiently, we’ll lose money, we won’t be prepared enough for the next disaster—and on and on.  

So, our need for safety and security is there each step of the way, directing our next steps. It’s a very primal place from which to lead our existence.

We find ourselves working more and more, taking on additional responsibilities simply because we think that will keep us safe. But what often happens is that we work ourselves out of relationships, away from our kids, into a health crisis or other catastrophe which keeps us running for more safety.

If you’re someone who wants to work less and do so without worrying, know that what’s stopping you is not that you haven’t got the right people or the right strategy or that you just haven’t figured it out yet.

What keeps you from working less is that you’re being motivated in your stressed-out moments by a primitive want for approval, control, and/or safety.

It’s not a delegation problem or a strategy problem. It’s an approval, control, or safety problem. 

The worst part is that actually getting the amount that the brain needs to feel approved, in control or safe is impossible, because just like a drug – you need more and more to get your “fix.”

The only way to do that – you guessed it – keep working at it and never slow down.

It’s liberating to understand what is really at the root of the problem, as opposed to spending your days trying and failing to fix it only to get get engaged in more self-defeating talk. 

These motivators come from deep-seated conditioning and unwritten rules that we have made with ourselves that this is how we will survive and succeed.

Knowing we are doing it for one of these reasons—it doesn’t matter which reason—helps us to take the next right actions.

Whether it’s our need for approval, safety, or control—we’re operating from a source of fear versus trust. 

In that space of stress, negativity, and fear, we are always going to be performing at a fraction of what we’re capable of.

And because we are inherently operating from a place that’s dropping tons of cortisol and adrenaline into our body versus a place of peace, our well-being will always be a fraction of what it could be too.

Understand that none of these 3 motivations for approval, safety, or control are “bad.” 

It is simply that overusing them as a means to cope prevents us from achieving our goal: working less. 

Continuously ask yourself, “What is my motivation here?”

  • The first step is noticing these patterns or “catching yourself in the act.”. This simple act releases you from that negative conditioning.
  • Once you see the pattern, the next thing to do is to challenge its validity. 

For example, ask yourself, “Has there ever been a time when you were not working hard, and things still happened?” or “Have things gone just fine without me being in the center of it?”

Imagine the difference it would make in your life to put your energy into moving closer to your dreams versus those overused coping mechanisms (the desire for approval, safety, and control) that are holding you back.

We must rethink this cultural conditioning and the unwritten rule in our homes and organizations that say working hard creates success. 

Working less, achieving more, and doing so without worrying is 100% possible! 

It may be different, but it doesn’t have to be difficult. Just because you haven’t done it for the first half doesn’t mean you can’t do something different starting now.

If working less and continuing to be successful or achieving more is your desire for the year, I encourage you to look at which of the three coping mechanisms you may be overusing. 

Is it approval, control, or safety? 

What’s really behind your resistance to working less? That is the ultimate question. 

Then remind yourself that it’s only you who can make the choice and take the actions to change your life.

When you change your perspective, your reality changes.

These cups of approval, control, and safety are all meant to be filled inside—by you. Do not wait for circumstances and conditions external to you to fill them. 

Stop waiting for circumstances to line up so that you can work less. 

Look for areas in your life where you have tended to overcommit yourself or how often you’re expecting and preparing for bad outcomes.  

The bottom line is we’re not unable to work less for the reasons that we think. And when we can see that clearly and own it—we actually can work less and let go of worrying while we do.

If you’re ready to overcome the pressured pace while you improve performance and freedom contact me for a connection call.

It’s never too late to create a career that wows you and a life aligned with your priorities and aspirations.  When you clear where you are resisting your next level, you can become a magnet of tremendous happiness and success.

In this episode, I share:

  • The ways we are conditioned to work hard by our parents, role models, and society  
  • How to accurately assess what keeps us from slowing down so that you can change it
  • Three coping mechanisms that will prevent you from ever taking your foot off the gas
  • How to rethink and rewrite the unwritten rules so that you enjoy more time with your family, improving your health — or whatever else you want

Resources and related episodes:

Subscribe on Apple Podcasts for more tips, tools, and inspiration to lead the optimal vision of your life, love, and leadership. Remember, a half version of you is not enough. The world needs the fullest version of you at play.

Listen on Apple Podcasts

___

About Rita Hyland

With over 20 years of experience as an executive and leadership coach, Rita helps leaders — emerging and established — excel in corporate and entrepreneurial environments.

Rita believes if leaders were more clear about how transformation really works and more intentional about creating what they want, their impact, success, and influence in the world would be unstoppable.

Through her coaching programs, private coaching, and masterminds, Rita shows leaders how to win consistently and create the impact and legacy they desire.

Central to Rita’s work is the understanding that you will never outperform your current programming, no matter how strong your willpower.

When you learn to use Rita’s proprietary Neuroleadership Growth Code, a technology that uses the best of neuroscience and transformational psychology to hit the brain’s buttons for change, YOU become both the solution and the strategy.

Her mission is to end talented, hard-working, and self-aware leaders spending another day stuck in self-doubt or confusion and not contributing their brilliant work and talent the world so desperately needs.

The 4-Step Problem Solving Framework

the-four-part-problem-solving-framework

You can listen to the full podcast episode here:

There is one massive area in which I see even the most successful leaders fall short. It is a skill that we will always need no matter what line of work we’re in. The skill I am referring to is problem solving. How we approach solving problems is key in determining our reality both at work and home. Mastering problem solving is so important, yet most of us are doing it all wrong. When setting out to face a challenge, the majority of people are addressing a problem that isn’t actually the problem at all. 

It is time to end the traditional ways we have been taught to solve a problem. The process begins with having the ability to accurately identify the problem and get to the root of the matter – the nitty gritty. It requires you to challenge your assumptions, rethink stories you tell yourself, and come to a clear resolution. Learning how to do this will allow you to put an end to any draining situations you previously thought were a struggle or impossible to solve.

In this episode I share:

  • My four-part problem solving framework that will help you take on any challenge you are facing
  • An easy way you can revisit roadblocks from a different perspective
  • A life-changing secret that will make a significant impact in how you view your external circumstances
  • The power of identifying the stories you tell yourself 
  • Why you must begin to distinguish facts from assumptions

Join the waitlist for the Bold Leader Life School here. You’ll receive first access to details when they are released!

More Resources: 

Subscribe on Apple Podcasts for more tips, tools, and inspiration to leading the optimal vision of your life, love, and leadership. Remember, a half version of you is not enough. The world needs the fullest version of you at play.

Listen on Apple Podcasts

___

About Rita Hyland

With over 20 years of experience as an executive and leadership coach, Rita helps leaders — emerging and established — excel in corporate and entrepreneurial environments.

Rita believes if leaders were more clear about how transformation really works and more intentional about creating what they want, their impact, success, and influence in the world would be unstoppable.

Through her coaching programs, private coaching, and masterminds, Rita shows leaders how to win consistently and create the impact and legacy they desire.

Central to Rita’s work is the understanding that you will never outperform your current programming, no matter how strong your willpower.

When you learn to use Rita’s proprietary Neuroleadership Growth Code, a technology which uses the best of neuroscience and transformational psychology to hit the brain’s buttons for change, YOU become both the solution and the strategy.

Her mission is to end talented, hard-working, and self-aware leaders spending another day stuck in self-doubt or confusion and not contributing their brilliant work and talent the world so desperately needs.

Redefining How We Measure Accomplishment For Your Ultimate Life

 

You can listen to the full podcast episode here:

We are all the busiest people we know. Between work and being plugged into our computers and phones 24/7, it’s go, go, go all day long with no end in sight. We are a doing-obsessed society. Our programming runs deep. As a result, we often don’t ask the right questions and we begin to live passively. While the hustle may look like success on the outside, are we actually accomplishing what we will measure our life on?

When it is all said and done, what is the life that you are intentionally working to create? Perhaps the more important question is, how will you measure it?  The time has come to rethink how we measure our success so that our days reflect the long-term picture we work so hard for.

In this episode I share:

  • The momentous shifts that occur when we redefine a successful life guided by our own design and metrics
  • How to expand your relationship with time from “I have a lack of time” to “I have all the time I need”
  • The top questions to ask yourself to determine how you want to measure your life 
  • A reminder of where our greatest joys come from so that you keep them front and center and allocate your resources accordingly.  

Join the waitlist for the Bold Leader Life School here. You’ll receive first access to details when they are released!

More Resources: 

Subscribe on Apple Podcasts for more tips, tools, and inspiration to leading the optimal vision of your life, love, and leadership. Remember, a half version of you is not enough. The world needs the fullest version of you at play.

Listen on Apple Podcasts

___

About Rita Hyland

With over 20 years of experience as an executive and leadership coach, Rita helps leaders — emerging and established — excel in corporate and entrepreneurial environments.

Rita believes if leaders were more clear about how transformation really works and more intentional about creating what they want, their impact, success, and influence in the world would be unstoppable.

Through her coaching programs, private coaching, and masterminds, Rita shows leaders how to win consistently and create the impact and legacy they desire.

Central to Rita’s work is the understanding that you will never outperform your current programming, no matter how strong your willpower.

When you learn to use Rita’s proprietary Neuroleadership Growth Code, a technology which uses the best of neuroscience and transformational psychology to hit the brain’s buttons for change, YOU become both the solution and the strategy.

Her mission is to end talented, hard-working, and self-aware leaders spending another day stuck in self-doubt or confusion and not contributing their brilliant work and talent the world so desperately needs.

Shorten the Lag Time Between Discouragement and Getting Back to Your A-Game

Shorten The Lag Time Between Discouragement And Getting Back To Your A-Game

Shorten the Lag Time Between Discouragement and Getting Back to Your A-Game

You can listen to the full podcast episode here:

If you have a heartbeat, you will experience pain and hurt at some point in your life. It’s inevitable. It’s not if you face struggle, but what you do with that pain when it shows up that matters. Will you let it stop you or drive you? This is where your resiliency comes into play. Understanding how to exercise our resiliency muscle is such an important and underrated skill, and yet it is one not taught in schools.

In order to fulfill our purpose in life, we must learn to get through those challenging moments without letting them define us. The first step is acknowledging that we are going through a hardship and allow ourselves to feel it rather than diminishing it. Today I’m going to show you the next steps that follow so you can decrease the lag time between experiencing the struggle and getting back to your A-game. Let’s remember that we are not in control of what happens tomorrow but we can keep discouragement from killing another day, no matter what kind of curveball is thrown our way.

In this episode I share:

  • The #1 mistake most people make when they face hardship at work or life
  • THE question that ensures that YOU–not your hurt– is in the driver’s seat 
  • The ultimate 5- step resilience strategy to overcome adversity every time
  • How to figure out precisely what your next right action

Join the waitlist for the Bold Leader Life School here. You’ll receive first access to details when they are released!

More Resources: 

Subscribe on Apple Podcasts for more tips, tools, and inspiration to leading the optimal vision of your life, love, and leadership. Remember, a half version of you is not enough. The world needs the fullest version of you at play.

Listen on Apple Podcasts

___

About Rita Hyland

With over 20 years of experience as an executive and leadership coach, Rita helps leaders — emerging and established — excel in corporate and entrepreneurial environments.

Rita believes if leaders were more clear about how transformation really works and more intentional about creating what they want, their impact, success, and influence in the world would be unstoppable.

Through her coaching programs, private coaching, and masterminds, Rita shows leaders how to win consistently and create the impact and legacy they desire.

Central to Rita’s work is the understanding that you will never outperform your current programming, no matter how strong your willpower.

When you learn to use Rita’s proprietary Neuroleadership Growth Code, a technology which uses the best of neuroscience and transformational psychology to hit the brain’s buttons for change, YOU become both the solution and the strategy.

Her mission is to end talented, hard-working, and self-aware leaders spending another day stuck in self-doubt or confusion and not contributing their brilliant work and talent the world so desperately needs.

what-i-learned-about-relationships-from-being-on-oprah

What I Learned About Relationships From Being On Oprah

what-i-learned-about-relationships-from-being-on-oprah

You can listen to the full podcast episode here:

Several years ago I was on Oprah. Not for the reasons that I had always dreamed of, but I was on Oprah nonetheless. Pretty cool, right? Well, let’s just say that the experience did not go as I expected. What I learned that day is something I will always hold with me. It changed my perspective on how to build healthy relationships and what I needed to take responsibility for. 

Sometimes we think we’re giving our absolute best to someone and doing everything right yet our relationship is not going smoothly. We know rich human connection to others is what gives us purpose.  Success without also maintaining our relationships can leave us drifting and feeling alone. It’s therefore crucial that we take the time and effort to get it right. Relationships are being challenged right now for so many reasons. Today’s episode is an invitation to actively look at who you are being in a relationship in which you are struggling. Too often our own self-deception holds us back when a terrific relationship is completely possible. There is a pathway to clean up and cultivate that relationship, and I am going to show you how you can do that starting today. 

In this episode I share:

  • The wake-up call I experienced as a guest on Oprah and the question she asked that shook me to my core
  • Why you don’t need another list of things to DO to improve your relationship
  • The ONE question that will offer the antidote for any struggling relationship
  • 5 actionable steps to achieve your ideal relationship in business and life 
  • 4 habits to eliminate in your daily conversations 

Join the waitlist for the Bold Leader Life School here. You’ll receive first access to details when they are released!

More Resources: 

Subscribe on Apple Podcasts for more tips, tools, and inspiration to leading the optimal vision of your life, love, and leadership. Remember, a half version of you is not enough. The world needs the fullest version of you at play.

Listen on Apple Podcasts

___

About Rita Hyland

With over 20 years of experience as an executive and leadership coach, Rita helps leaders — emerging and established — excel in corporate and entrepreneurial environments.

Rita believes if leaders were more clear about how transformation really works and more intentional about creating what they want, their impact, success, and influence in the world would be unstoppable.

Through her coaching programs, private coaching, and masterminds, Rita shows leaders how to win consistently and create the impact and legacy they desire.

Central to Rita’s work is the understanding that you will never outperform your current programming, no matter how strong your willpower.

When you learn to use Rita’s proprietary Neuroleadership Growth Code, a technology which uses the best of neuroscience and transformational psychology to hit the brain’s buttons for change, YOU become both the solution and the strategy.

Her mission is to end talented, hard-working, and self-aware leaders spending another day stuck in self-doubt or confusion and not contributing their brilliant work and talent the world so desperately needs.

How To Use The Power When You Shine Bright

You can listen to the full podcast episode here:

We’re all here to build and experience an incredible life. Perhaps you are already at a point where you feel that you have accomplished that. But when is the last time you shouted your success from the rooftops? This leads to my next big question which is, have you ever diminished your wins, or as I like to say – dimmed your light? I would venture to say if you’re like most the answer is yes. 

I know what it’s like not to share your happiness so as not to make others feel bad or uncomfortable. We do this because we don’t want to seem like a threat or seem different than the next person. It’s all part of our culture, and it needs to change. We are told to be joyful and successful, but not too much. We are taught this very early on in life. I see it already in my own children. Let’s make today the day that changes. Rather than bonding over our weaknesses, how about we begin to speak freely about our talents and victories and in turn, inspire others to do the same.

In this episode I share:

  • Why we tend to diminish our successes and the consequences of doing so
  • Some of the subtle ways we dim ourselves around others
  • The main differentiator when you’re celebrating your wins and successes
  • How to change our approach to celebrating ourselves

What is your take on this topic? Send me a message on Instagram @rita_hyland_coaching and let me know. I would love to hear from you!

Join the waitlist for the Bold Leader Life School here. You’ll receive first access to details when they are released!

More Resources: 

Subscribe on Apple Podcasts for more tips, tools, and inspiration to leading the optimal vision of your life, love, and leadership. Remember, a half version of you is not enough. The world needs the fullest version of you at play.

Listen on Apple Podcasts

___

About Rita Hyland

With over 20 years of experience as an executive and leadership coach, Rita helps leaders — emerging and established — excel in corporate and entrepreneurial environments.

Rita believes if leaders were more clear about how transformation really works and more intentional about creating what they want, their impact, success, and influence in the world would be unstoppable.

Through her coaching programs, private coaching, and masterminds, Rita shows leaders how to win consistently and create the impact and legacy they desire.

Central to Rita’s work is the understanding that you will never outperform your current programming, no matter how strong your willpower.

When you learn to use Rita’s proprietary Neuroleadership Growth Code, a technology which uses the best of neuroscience and transformational psychology to hit the brain’s buttons for change, YOU become both the solution and the strategy.

Her mission is to end talented, hard-working, and self-aware leaders spending another day stuck in self-doubt or confusion and not contributing their brilliant work and talent the world so desperately needs.

how-to-think-about-building-your-legacy

How To Think About Building Your Legacy

how-to-think-about-building-your-legacy

You can listen to the full podcast episode here:

Picture this – it’s the day of your funeral and all the important people in your life are gathered to pay their respects. What is it that they will say about you? What is the legacy that you have left behind to be remembered for? What impact did you make on the world and those around you? If this feels morbid, or makes you a bit uncomfortable, I get it. Hear me out though. 

Research shows that people actually feel better in the face of death if they are a part of something that will live on after them. Ultimately, your legacy is all you’ve got! It may be something we don’t often consider, but your legacy comes before your vision and your goals. Determining what it is that you want yours to be is the foundation that will lead your life decisions. To put it bluntly, we all are going to die one day. What will you leave behind when you go? You have the power to choose.

In this episode I share:

  • Ways to begin thinking about building your legacy
  • How to identify your legacy in a practical and actionable way
  • Why leaving a legacy is one of the most powerful things you can do
  • Questions to ask yourself when building your desired legacy
  • How joy comes into play when thinking about what you want to leave behind

Join the waitlist for the Bold Leader Life School here. You’ll receive first access to details when they are released!

More Resources: 

Subscribe on Apple Podcasts for more tips, tools, and inspiration to leading the optimal vision of your life, love, and leadership. Remember, a half version of you is not enough. The world needs the fullest version of you at play.

Listen on Apple Podcasts

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About Rita Hyland

With over 20 years of experience as an executive and leadership coach, Rita helps leaders — emerging and established — excel in corporate and entrepreneurial environments.

Rita believes if leaders were more clear about how transformation really works and more intentional about creating what they want, their impact, success, and influence in the world would be unstoppable.

Through her coaching programs, private coaching, and masterminds, Rita shows leaders how to win consistently and create the impact and legacy they desire.

Central to Rita’s work is the understanding that you will never outperform your current programming, no matter how strong your willpower.

When you learn to use Rita’s proprietary Neuroleadership Growth Code, a technology which uses the best of neuroscience and transformational psychology to hit the brain’s buttons for change, YOU become both the solution and the strategy.

Her mission is to end talented, hard-working, and self-aware leaders spending another day stuck in self-doubt or confusion and not contributing their brilliant work and talent the world so desperately needs.

Rethink And Unlearn Faster So You Can Reinvent

Rethink And Unlearn Faster So You Can Reinvent

You can listen to the full podcast episode here:

We all have moments that have changed our life in one way or another. When I look back on some of these moments for myself, these changes have occurred for one reason. It has been due to my willingness to rethink the way I was thinking rather than hanging onto previous beliefs simply because that was what was comfortable. If you’re like most, when you look back at your life, I bet you’d see that the most significant moments came from thinking about things differently. So today I want to challenge you to think about how you are looking at situations and assumptions in your life.

This episode is your invitation to challenge and let go of assumptions and opinions that are no longer serving you well, causing you to stagnate or struggle. Challenge what you believe is fact, even when it is uncomfortable to do so. To learn and grow, our perspectives must evolve as well. One cannot be without the other. Master the art of rethinking your assumptions and you will position yourself for years of success and happiness to come.

In this episode I share:

  • Stories of how shifting your thinking can pay off and even save your life
  • The first time I learned that it was possible to unlearn what you previously thought was true
  • The significant benefits of unlearning things in order to reinvent yourself
  • Looking at when we need to rethink and how to do it
  • Practical and actionable steps to rethink your assumptions quicker

Join the waitlist for the Bold Leader Life School here. You’ll receive first access to details when they are released!

More Resources: 

Subscribe on Apple Podcasts for more tips, tools, and inspiration to leading the optimal vision of your life, love, and leadership. Remember, a half version of you is not enough. The world needs the fullest version of you at play.

Listen on Apple Podcasts

___

About Rita Hyland

With over 20 years of experience as an executive and leadership coach, Rita helps leaders — emerging and established — excel in corporate and entrepreneurial environments.

Rita believes if leaders were more clear about how transformation really works and more intentional about creating what they want, their impact, success, and influence in the world would be unstoppable.

Through her coaching programs, private coaching, and masterminds, Rita shows leaders how to win consistently and create the impact and legacy they desire.

Central to Rita’s work is the understanding that you will never outperform your current programming, no matter how strong your willpower.

When you learn to use Rita’s proprietary Neuroleadership Growth Code, a technology which uses the best of neuroscience and transformational psychology to hit the brain’s buttons for change, YOU become both the solution and the strategy.

Her mission is to end talented, hard-working, and self-aware leaders spending another day stuck in self-doubt or confusion and not contributing their brilliant work and talent the world so desperately needs.

candid-conflict-conversation-made-easy

Candid Conflict Conversation Made Easy

candid-conflict-conversation-made-easy

You can listen to the full podcast episode here:


Are you someone who tends to avoid the difficult conversations with others? Maybe you are way more interested in keeping the peace over rocking the boat, even if staying quiet is negatively affecting your work or personal life. Having confrontational conversations with someone can be tough, emotional, and uncomfortable. However, I would argue that avoiding these conversations costs you more.  Your ability to engage in difficult conversations is directly proportional to the quality of your relationships, fulfillment of your aspirations, and successful navigation of your career. 

As humans, we defer from these candid conversations for many reasons. For example, we don’t want to risk making another person uncomfortable or unhappy. Perhaps you worry that it will hurt your career or destroy someone else’s opinion of you. In reality, not confronting can hurt your relationships and career in another way.  Your voice is your most valuable asset and not using it could hurt your confidence and impact long-term. The most important thing to remember is that with a bit of intention, it is absolutely possible to effectively talk out disagreements and walk away with a positive outcome. Let me show you how my clients and I do this remarkably easily and well!

In this episode I share:

  • A personal story of when I learned how to use intention in my communication, despite feeling uncomfortable
  • Ways that you can reroute your resistance to allowing others to be unhappy
  • Using the acronym VOICE to make conflict conversation easy
  • Why transparency and intention is vital in communication
  • Examples of language to use during challenging conversations to avoid the need for the fight or flight response
  • What happens when we have a breakdown in communication

Join the waitlist for the Bold Leader Life School here. You’ll receive first access to details when they are released!

More Resources: 

Subscribe on Apple Podcasts for more tips, tools, and inspiration to leading the optimal vision of your life, love, and leadership. Remember, a half version of you is not enough. The world needs the fullest version of you at play.

Listen on Apple Podcasts

___

About Rita Hyland

With over 20 years of experience as an executive and leadership coach, Rita helps leaders — emerging and established — excel in corporate and entrepreneurial environments.

Rita believes if leaders were more clear about how transformation really works and more intentional about creating what they want, their impact, success, and influence in the world would be unstoppable.

Through her coaching programs, private coaching, and masterminds, Rita shows leaders how to win consistently and create the impact and legacy they desire.

Central to Rita’s work is the understanding that you will never outperform your current programming, no matter how strong your willpower.

When you learn to use Rita’s proprietary Neuroleadership Growth Code, a technology which uses the best of neuroscience and transformational psychology to hit the brain’s buttons for change, YOU become both the solution and the strategy.

Her mission is to end talented, hard-working, and self-aware leaders spending another day stuck in self-doubt or confusion and not contributing their brilliant work and talent the world so desperately needs.

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