Tag Archive for: burnout

motivated

How To Stay Motivated When You’re Just Not Feeling It

motivated

Listen to the full podcast episode to learn about the science-backed practice that has not only changed my life but also the lives of countless people over the last two decades. This is something you can’t ignore if you want to achieve that great goal you identified for this year and write your new future.

“How do we stay motivated in those moments when we just don’t feel like it?”

As entrepreneurs, leaders of teams, managers, bosses, and parents we all have times when we lose our motivation or lose track of the reason that we’re doing what we’re doing.  Moments when we’re ‘just not feeling it.’ And it’s real! We’re not always going to be in our peak zone. 

Today, I’m giving you a few simple shifts and practical steps so that you can return to your flow — especially in the moments when the pace is fast and the progress is slow. 

Those moments can be little blips or they can be extensive ones that last a week, a month or more!

  • The first of the shifts to return us to center is to allow ourselves to be imperfect. We have to allow ourselves to have those moments where we’re not feeling the feeling. And to be kind to ourselves when they happen. 

What would it look like to accept that your best today isn’t the same as your best on another day? To accept that we aren’t always at the same high level every day? 

One of the challenges we create for ourselves is that we have a resistance to imperfection. This costs us as we get lost in comparison and self attack. High performers tend to be particularly susceptible because they have created such high expectations on themselves. 

As we know, imperfection is an addiction to dissatisfaction because imperfection is impossible.

So on a day where you’re not feeling motivated and the road ahead looks long—embrace the messiness of it! Instead of suffering by fighting with reality, lean into the mess. As a young child my family and I loved to visit the ocean frequently.  It was then when I was taught that if I was ever caught in a current, to not resist but instead to go in the direction of the waves. We suffer when we fight reality in the same way when we go against an ocean’s current. 

  • Don’t underestimate those small actions that compound. 

When I first started having kids, I spent time resisting and fighting life. I suffered because I was fighting the reality that there were going to be interruptions in my day. Often it would leave me feeling irritable and angry and resentful at myself and others because I wasn’t able to get into the flow. Of course, I didn’t realize it was my expectations that were costing me. My belief that it should be some other way.  

When I began to accept it and work with it as opposed to spending the rest of my life fighting what was real, I was not only happier but more productive too. I started to embrace the law of The Slight Edge, which is that small things done consistently lead to significant results.   

It’s easy to see people who climb mountains and think that they achieved that goal in a week. But those who have climbed mountains have failed many times! They’ve taken a lot of steps over and over again and trained to get to that point.

It’s very easy, especially in this world of social media, for us to make up stories about other people. And especially easy when they are telling a story.

Remember: there is nobody like you! There is nobody that has your exact story. And to compare yourself is simply to be addicted to dissatisfaction and ensures you’ll stay out of your flow even longer.

Celebrate yourself in the moment! Acknowledge yourself—even in the imperfection. 

And don’t underestimate the fact that even though you can’t do everything, that you can’t do something.

One of the best practical steps is to say, “What’s the smallest thing I can do right now?” What can I do that will plant a seed or leverage something for myself today—in the smallest way? 

Some examples:

  • Pulling a file.
  • Locating a paper. 
  • Opening a book.

It doesn’t matter what it is! It’s about tuning in, slowing down, listening, and identifying that small action that you can take.

We know that 20% of what we do—the vital few things we do—lead to 80% of our results. 

When we’re aware of these few things we do, we recognize that we’re always—even though the lists seem long and the progress seems slow—able to take just the next step.

  • Train yourself to hold space for life’s curveballs. 

And by hold space, I mean leave more blank space. When we don’t do that, we set ourselves up to never expect that life is messy. 

By saving space for life’s messy moments, we stop allowing ourselves to constantly be set up for failure.  Instead we can ask ourselves…

  • How can we set ourselves up to succeed? 
  • Where do we need support? 
  • Where do we leave room to get support?

This leads me to another point… 

  • Consume support and use personal development to upgrade your life. 

Use these moments as a reminder—an opportunity—to seek out and receive support. Whether it’s paid or not! An expert or a trusted friend. Find those people and call on them.

I recently had a moment where I was getting hijacked by something. Some feelings were coming up about a big change and I thought to myself, “Okay, I need some support to process this and to get myself out of it.” 

I have a team of trusted advisors that I use in different capacities at different times. I always have my team to go back to to help me process things as they come up.

Who are your trusted advisors? Take a minute to locate them in your mind and maybe jot their names down on a piece of paper.

They can be:

  • a friend that supports you or holds you accountable 
  • a therapist
  • a coach
  • a community of people (maybe a Facebook group)

But whoever that is for you—you have them! You don’t have to do it alone. We cannot do it alone. 

  • Validate feelings vs avoiding them.

I can’t underscore enough the importance of us validating our feelings as opposed to “shoulding” on ourselves. You know—saying we “shouldn’t be feeling unmotivated today.” That’s the worst thing to do!

Your feelings are messengers. They’re there to tell you something. They’re there to guide you in a new direction.

So instead of telling yourself all the reasons this is inefficient and wrong and what else you should be doing—embrace the feeling and write it down. Maybe even journal about how you’re feeling. And be kind to yourself because there’s a part of you that’s feeling those feelings. 

This allows you to metabolize and process the feelings, as opposed to having them hijack you again tomorrow. 

  • We have to remember that our target is our purpose. 

Too often, we get consumed with our lists and what we ought to get done. Understand that your list will never get done. If it’s done, you’re dead. 

Shift your perception, your mindset, your definition of a “To Do” list and embrace that it gives you opportunity, possibility, and meaning. It’s all in how you define what that means.

  • If there’s still a “To Do” list, are you saying that you’re not enough? 
  • If there’s more to do or you haven’t responded, does that mean you’re inadequate? 

Be specific with and notice the stories that you tell yourself.

  • Protect your peace.

Probably one of the most important things that my clients do is that they are very protective of their state. They protect their peace, knowing that when they’re in the highest frequency of peace, they always perform at the highest level!

When you operate from the thought and belief that when you do what’s best for yourself, it’s always best for another. It’s not selfish.  It’s self-care.

Another question I ask myself and others regularly is, “If nothing were to change in my circumstances, what would I need to be at peace in this moment?”

Protecting our peace is how we maintain as successful entrepreneurs, masterful teachers, and positively impactful leaders. It’s actually our #1 job daily. 

Can you see how having these seven tools in your back pocket can prevent you from being completely hijacked when work or life gets complicated or messy?  

Remember it’s completely normal to have days when we feel off.  The important thing is to be kind to yourself and not give our struggles meanings they don’t have. Our messy days are not personal.  They are not a reflection of our worth.  They are simply life.  

Remind yourself that you are more ok than you think right now.  

Be generous.

And when you REALLY aren’t feeling it, one of the best things you can do is to perform a random act of kindness. 

Think of one way you can immediately make someone else’s life better. It helps us to get out of our own head and remind ourselves that we matter.  

Make sure that you stay in the game and finish what you started. 

There is only one YOU! There’s a reason you’re doing what you’re doing. Make your purpose your target—and don’t stop. 

We all have moments where we need to rest. And rest when you must, but don’t you quit. 

Give yourself permission to move with the flow and to embrace some of these practices. 

Much like a small change in a golfer’s hand on a putter can change the trajectory of the ball significantly, a few small habit changes in life’s messy moments, make a big difference as well.

Ask yourself…

What’s the smallest thing that I can do today to make a difference or make some progress or impact?

And then start making those small improvements right away to put some doable, positive habits in place that will upgrade your business and life!

The world desperately needs what you have to give.  

In these moments, continue to find joy, inspiration, self-improvement, and self-awareness. 

When you do, your business, community, and family all benefit! Thank you for being a part of this community.  Thank you for being you and being a bright light and leader in this world!

In this episode, I share:

  • Seven tools to remain steady (and return to flight) when we’re just not feeling up to what work and life need from us today
  • The mindset management high achievers use to maintain their motivation.
  • The most important question to ask in order to meet your daily #1 goal of protecting your peace   

Resources and related episodes:

Subscribe on Apple Podcasts for more tips, tools, and inspiration to lead the optimal vision of your life, love, and leadership. Remember, a half version of you is not enough. The world needs the fullest version of you at play.

Listen on Apple Podcasts

___

About Rita Hyland

With over 20 years of experience as an executive and leadership coach, Rita helps leaders — emerging and established — excel in corporate and entrepreneurial environments.

Rita believes if leaders were more clear about how transformation really works and more intentional about creating what they want, their impact, success, and influence in the world would be unstoppable.

Through her coaching programs, private coaching, and masterminds, Rita shows leaders how to win consistently and create the impact and legacy they desire.

Central to Rita’s work is the understanding that you will never outperform your current programming, no matter how strong your willpower.

When you learn to use Rita’s proprietary Neuroleadership Growth Code, a technology that uses the best of neuroscience and transformational psychology to hit the brain’s buttons for change, YOU become both the solution and the strategy.

Her mission is to end talented, hard-working, and self-aware leaders spending another day stuck in self-doubt or confusion and not contributing their brilliant work and talent the world so desperately needs.

mindset management

Your Mindset Management Practice For Higher Performance

mindset management

Listen to the full podcast episode to learn about the science-backed practice that has not only changed my life but also the lives of countless people over the last two decades. This is something you can’t ignore if you want to achieve that great goal you identified for this year and write your new future.

Many of us place a lot of pressure on ourselves to perform extraordinarily every day.  But there’s something important we’re missing.  We don’t prioritize training our mindset to perform at those extraordinary levels.

When we know that how we think determines how we react to things, it becomes our #1 priority to manage our thoughts.  Not doing so is like setting out to build a house with a sand shovel.  We wouldn’t do it.

We expect to experience worry-free, confident, high-performing days but we’re either unaware of how to leverage our mindset or we lack the discipline to manage our mindset for the high-performance we expect. 

As a result, too often our sloppy, unmanaged thoughts leave us feeling… stressed that we can’t get it all done, doubting we have what it takes to deliver, critical and short with others, exhausted by what we see as limited progress and second-guessing we will see our existing success to fruition. 

Recently my family and I watched several Netflix documentaries about seasoned sports players and teams. They highlighted the strengths and vulnerabilities of athletes in a variety of sports—golf, basketball, football, etc. I am always fascinated by the psychological performance and rituals that these top-performing athletes practice to perform at such high levels.

They know that how we think about things drives our behavior. That performing extraordinarily begins with having a high-performance mindset. So they place a premium on their mindset management. 

It got me thinking —  why is it that those of us in other industries don’t place that same level of attention on our mindset management? Why do leaders in other industries not apply that same level of consistency and discipline to their mindsets that athletes do?  

Messy, unbridled mindsets too often leave us feeling… 

  • Stressed over endless to-do lists
  • Wondering if we have what it takes to achieve our goals
  • Exhausted and burnt-out because the pressure is high and progress is slow
  • Unfocused because we’re trying to do too much at a high level

These feelings result in average performance — at best!

So what can be done to develop a high-performance mindset?  

Here’s a favorite short mindset management practice that you can use daily to set yourself up for success. The best part is that it can be done in less than five minutes. 

Each prompt has a specific benefit backed by brain science to help you improve your well-being and performance. 

It’s what high-performing athletes and modern day leaders use to show up and perform their best every day when it matters most.

Managing our mind isn’t something we can only employ some of the time. Everyday we face unexpected challenges and things outside of our control.  This is when being able to manage our thoughts becomes invaluable.

Here’s how to do your 5-minute Morning Mindset Management Practice.

Ask and answer each of the following five prompts.

  1. What are 3 things I’m grateful for? Sitting in the answer to this question directly affects the hypothalamus. The hypothalamus is a part of the brain that influences sleep, hunger, and stress. When brains were studied while a subject was experiencing gratitude, they found the subject’s hypothalamus was being influenced in real-time. When you are focusing on what you’re grateful for, you create new neural pathways for expansion and advancement.
  2. What 3 things would make today great? From a scientific perspective, this activates your brain’s Reticular Activating System or RAS. What happens is when you direct your RAS for what to look for, it sets out to find it — without you even being aware of it. You’ve likely experienced when you’ve decided to buy a certain car and suddenly you see the car is everywhere.  There was a famous study in the NBA on basketball players who weren’t hitting their free throw shots. The underperforming athletes were broken into three groups. The first group did not practice their free throws for a week. A second group was told to practice exactly 100 free throw shots every day. And a third group was told not to physically practice but to imagine perfect free throw shots every day. The third group, which only imagined hitting shots perfectly,  improved their performance the most. The brain receives 11 million bits of information per second, but it can only process 33 bits per second. The 33 it processes are the 33 it is told to look for.  It seeks to fill your order. 
  3. Who am I going to be today? Think: Who do I need to be in order to perform as I want? We typically make to-do lists. But the doing is directly influenced by who we’re showing up as. Your way of being informs the actions you will take so you can perform at the level you want. So what qualities are you going to bring to your day? It’s the Be — Do — Have model of performance that high-performers use. Many of us were taught that doing is where performance comes from, but in reality it’s your identity which is a reflection of your thoughts and ways of being that directs and does the heavy lifting. 
  4. What am I open to receiving? Too often we don’t realize that we really are not open to accepting what it is we say we want. Remember change is uncertain and that can be uncomfortable to our mind.  By answering this prompt, you prepare your mindset to notice and accept the opportunities before you. 
  5. What am I going to give? Maintaining the flow between giving and receiving is critical. Living a purpose-driven life is important to us all. We all want to matter. By clarifying what you will contribute, you align yourself with your purpose, passion and proficiency. In turn, you make a difference.

What happens when you learn to manage your mindset? You will…

  • Have the endurance necessary for big challenges and initiatives
  • Be able to navigate unexpected challenges 
  • Improve your ability to handle criticism which you will definitely encounter as a result of being in the arena 
  • Executing tasks easier because you’re not dealing with limiting thoughts
  • Focus on the most important things 
  • Managing problems and know when to let of anything that’s out of your control

High performance begins with self-awareness.

Our feelings and actions are directly impacted by our thoughts. Your mindset management practice is too important to leave to chance! It drives everything you do.

Don’t spend another day putting pressure on yourself to perform extraordinarily without providing yourself with the mindset that sets you up for success. 

In this episode, I share:

  • What the sports industry and high-achieving athletes can teach us about mindset management and performance
  • What’s keeping us from performing at the levels we think we “should” be able to
  • A 5-minute morning mindset management practice every leader can use to see immediate improvement in well-being and performance 

Resources and related episodes:

 

Subscribe on Apple Podcasts for more tips, tools, and inspiration to lead the optimal vision of your life, love, and leadership. Remember, a half version of you is not enough. The world needs the fullest version of you at play.

Listen on Apple Podcasts

___

About Rita Hyland

With over 20 years of experience as an executive and leadership coach, Rita helps leaders — emerging and established — excel in corporate and entrepreneurial environments.

Rita believes if leaders were more clear about how transformation really works and more intentional about creating what they want, their impact, success, and influence in the world would be unstoppable.

Through her coaching programs, private coaching, and masterminds, Rita shows leaders how to win consistently and create the impact and legacy they desire.

Central to Rita’s work is the understanding that you will never outperform your current programming, no matter how strong your willpower.

When you learn to use Rita’s proprietary Neuroleadership Growth Code, a technology that uses the best of neuroscience and transformational psychology to hit the brain’s buttons for change, YOU become both the solution and the strategy.

Her mission is to end talented, hard-working, and self-aware leaders spending another day stuck in self-doubt or confusion and not contributing their brilliant work and talent the world so desperately needs.

How To Make Work Life Fulfillment A Reality For Women

how-to-make-work-life-fulfillment-a-reality-for-women

You can listen to the full podcast episode here:

As of February 2021, nearly 3 million women had left the workforce. That number has only risen since then, as women step out due to circumstances such as extreme burnout and a desperate desire to take a break from trying to achieve some sort of work-life balance. This is the story of many women in today’s workforce, as they want to make work-life fulfillment work for them, and yet today’s way of doing things is simply not sustainable. 

I heard this point of view firsthand when I recently spoke to a group of established female leaders at a premier recruiting firm. These women, like so many others that I talk to, are successful, talented, and looked up to by their peers. They are also overloaded and battle internally with how to do meaningful and life-changing work they do without sacrificing their personal life and family to do it. There is a solution that will allow female leaders everywhere to shift from the hustle and overwhelm to fulfillment and balance. 

The answer is not in working more, doing more, or being more. Working harder does not equal success. In fact, nothing in our external world actually has to change at all. The solution to achieving work-life fulfillment lies in paying more attention to our own blindspots and self-imposed limitations by internally activating. More specifically, when you align your identity with your desired future, you can become the bold, fulfilled female leader that you’ve always dreamed of being. Better yet, you can do all of this without sacrificing everything you’ve already worked so hard to create.

In this episode I share:

  • My perspective on today’s female workforce and their leaders
  • Specific steps to move from the overloading hustling female leader to the fulfilled female leader
  • The number one mistake I see being made over and over again when it comes to work-life balance
  • An analogy to explain how women can create work-life success and satisfaction at the same time
  • A question that every woman in their 40s and 50s should answer in order to thrive in this next decade.
  • 3 ways that the fulfilled female leader internally activates

More Resources: 

Subscribe on Apple Podcasts for more tips, tools, and inspiration to leading the optimal vision of your life, love, and leadership. Remember, a half version of you is not enough. The world needs the fullest version of you at play.

Listen on Apple Podcasts

___

About Rita Hyland

With over 20 years of experience as an executive and leadership coach, Rita helps leaders — emerging and established — excel in corporate and entrepreneurial environments.

Rita believes if leaders were more clear about how transformation really works and more intentional about creating what they want, their impact, success, and influence in the world would be unstoppable.

Through her coaching programs, private coaching, and masterminds, Rita shows leaders how to win consistently and create the impact and legacy they desire.

Central to Rita’s work is the understanding that you will never outperform your current programming, no matter how strong your willpower.

When you learn to use Rita’s proprietary Neuroleadership Growth Code, a technology which uses the best of neuroscience and transformational psychology to hit the brain’s buttons for change, YOU become both the solution and the strategy.

Her mission is to end talented, hard-working, and self-aware leaders spending another day stuck in self-doubt or confusion and not contributing their brilliant work and talent the world so desperately needs.

nurture-your-team-during-burnout

How to Nurture Your Team During a Period of Epic Burnout

nurture-your-team-during-burnout

You can listen to the full podcast episode here:

A 2021 survey reported that nearly 90% of workers experienced burnout in the past year. In addition, more than half of people surveyed said that their workloads had actually increased during the pandemic. Clearly a work-life balance is not being achieved, and what we’re doing in the workforce is not working.

The big question is, what can you do as the leader of your team to ensure that your people are being taken care of? Taking the time and mental space to consider this question is important, because one thing is for certain. The data shows that employees are leaving their workplace at record numbers and either seeking out employers who better meet their lifestyle needs and desires or leaving the workforce altogether.

As a leader, it is your job to make sure that your team feels respected and recognized, and that they are given opportunities to excel at what they do. As the saying goes, if you don’t invest in the root, you won’t receive or produce the fruit. The same goes for your team. You have to nurture and invest in them. Take every opportunity to let your team know that they matter. When your people feel like they are genuinely seen and encouraged, they will be inspired to do great work. If you commit to this approach of leading from the heart, you just may find it to be the best investment you will ever make in your business.

In this episode I share:

  • A personal story of the moment I felt seen in a new and important way 
  • 5 concrete steps you can take to build a culture and team that feels like they belong
  • What the data shows about burnout and employees leaving the workforce
  • A reminder to check in on yourself to determine if you are nurturing and investing in your team

More Resources: 

Subscribe on Apple Podcasts for more tips, tools, and inspiration to leading the optimal vision of your life, love, and leadership. Remember, a half version of you is not enough. The world needs the fullest version of you at play.

Listen on Apple Podcasts

___

About Rita Hyland

With over 20 years of experience as an executive and leadership coach, Rita helps leaders — emerging and established — excel in corporate and entrepreneurial environments.

Rita believes if leaders were more clear about how transformation really works and more intentional about creating what they want, their impact, success, and influence in the world would be unstoppable.

Through her coaching programs, private coaching, and masterminds, Rita shows leaders how to win consistently and create the impact and legacy they desire.

Central to Rita’s work is the understanding that you will never outperform your current programming, no matter how strong your willpower.

When you learn to use Rita’s proprietary Neuroleadership Growth Code, a technology which uses the best of neuroscience and transformational psychology to hit the brain’s buttons for change, YOU become both the solution and the strategy.

Her mission is to end talented, hard-working, and self-aware leaders spending another day stuck in self-doubt or confusion and not contributing their brilliant work and talent the world so desperately needs.

Maintaining-A-Calm-Inner-State-When-the-World-Around-You-Is-Not

Maintaining A Calm Inner State When the World Around You Is Not

Maintaining-A-Calm-Inner-State-When-the-World-Around-You-Is-Not

You can listen to the full podcast episode here:

Do you have trouble turning your mind off? When you wake up in the morning, does your brain instantly begin racing as it considers all that needs to get done that day? If the answer is yes, then you are beginning your day like so many others.  It’s in a state of disturbance — not calm — as the anxious thinking begins the second your alarm goes off. It’s no way to live, and yet it’s the norm for society. 

We are living in a time where stress and burnout are more common than not. We’re busy and that is costing us connection with ourselves and those we are here to love and serve. Even in the more quiet moments, it’s challenging to be still and enjoy the peace and ease. 

So, if you’re feeling like you just can’t slow down, I have something for you. Your solution lies in the ability to cultivate and maintain an inner calmness. It’s a superpower, a bona fide magic pill that can absolutely transform your world. There’s even the science to back up its real time benefits. The rising growth-minded leaders who are making change and expanding their impact on a day to day basis have this figured out, and you can too.

In this episode I share:

  • The 3 things that create inner calmness every morning in less than five minutes
  • The scientific benefits of having moments of stillness and documenting gratitude daily
  • Life-changing results that occur when we don’t allow our thoughts to disturb us
  • What to do when you begin to fall out of your inner calm state

More Resources: 

Subscribe on Apple Podcasts for more tips, tools, and inspiration to leading the optimal vision of your life, love, and leadership. Remember, a half version of you is not enough. The world needs the fullest version of you at play.

Listen on Apple Podcasts

___

About Rita Hyland

With over 20 years of experience as an executive and leadership coach, Rita helps leaders — emerging and established — excel in corporate and entrepreneurial environments.

Rita believes if leaders were more clear about how transformation really works and more intentional about creating what they want, their impact, success, and influence in the world would be unstoppable.

Through her coaching programs, private coaching, and masterminds, Rita shows leaders how to win consistently and create the impact and legacy they desire.

Central to Rita’s work is the understanding that you will never outperform your current programming, no matter how strong your willpower.

When you learn to use Rita’s proprietary Neuroleadership Growth Code, a technology which uses the best of neuroscience and transformational psychology to hit the brain’s buttons for change, YOU become both the solution and the strategy.

Her mission is to end talented, hard-working, and self-aware leaders spending another day stuck in self-doubt or confusion and not contributing their brilliant work and talent the world so desperately needs.

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