Thank you for all of the great questions you’ve been sending for “Ask Rita Live.” Keep ‘em coming.
Last night I looked over those questions you’ve sent and that I haven’t gotten to yet. I was seeking “the question behind the question” and I found a common thread.
You might THINK your question is a technical one about how to get what you really want in your business, your career, and your relationships, but there’s really something more behind it actually.
It’s something I see a lot of people struggling with, and it has to do with something I call “doing you.”
I was introduced to this idea of “Do You” when I was browsing titles in a book store. You may not know this but Russell Simmons (the hip hop mogul) wrote a personal development book? It’s called “Do You!” I still haven’t read it. But once I heard the title, it stuck in my mind. It’s a very simple way to sum up a complex topic.
See a lot of your questions are REALLY questions about “doing you”—or more specifically, your fears around doing so. I’ve received many questions from you along these lines…how can I get paid to do what I love? How do I figure out what I want? How do I improve the relationship I’m in or attract someone who really loves me? How do I improve my leadership at work? How do I love this life I’m living?
Here’s your answer: If you want to take your business, career, and relationships (read life) to the next level, “DO YOU!”
Because who do people really want to connect with? Who do people really want to be led by, to buy from, or be in a relationship with?
Answer: They want you!
Remember, it is irresistibly attractive to be you even with your quirks and mistakes. Those actually make you more real and lovable.
It’s not how clever you were, or how beautiful your outfit or website was, or if you got it all “right” at the company meeting…
No. No it’s not.
There’s a saying “people may forget what you said, but they will never forget how you made them feel.” Yes, its’ cheesy but its also dead-on true, no matter what you do.
If you want to be truly memorable, and (as Seth Godin puts it) remarkable, you absolutely have to put YOU into your business, career, and relationships.
Now here’s the rub: this can be scary! Because it involves putting yourself out there in a really, authentic, and often vulnerable way.
But I also want to let you know that the payoff is WORTH IT! It is worth moving through your fear to hear and experience the ones that say WOW you really made a difference in how I am able to connect and enjoy my customers, my direct reports, my spouse, myself! Wow, you really opened up a world to me that shows me how good life can get!
I want you to think about this – what are your fears? What has happened when you’ve put yourself out there — in a Real way instead of hiding behind a cool or corporate façade?
Bottom line: It’s time to “Do You.”
Action step: In the next 24 hours, find two people, (your direct reports, partner, or clients) and tell them something real about you. Be more upfront, honest, and more personal than you’ve ever been with them. For you go-getters, go ahead and do this for a full week.
Not only will you find ‘doing you’ completely liberating and energizing, you will likely be surprised by the ease, connectedness, and increase to your bottom line that ‘doing you’ elicits.
This is where your results, happiness and fulfillment begin.
May this be your best year of “doing you” ever!