When my computer starts giving me lackluster or “wonky” results that I don’t understand or like, the easiest thing to do is hit the “restart” button. Just yesterday I pushed it when my wireless printer went down. One minute later—BAM! — I was up and running again.
Don’t you wish we could do that with life too? That is, reset and start fresh when it feels like we’ve been knocked down?
I’d love it when I’m in the middle of a tough creative process and start questioning does this even matter. Or when my kids are in pain and having challenges I can’t fix. When I’m caught off-guard and something really unsavory pops out of nowhere. Or when something I’ve been counting on doesn’t go as expected.
Ahh…to have a reset button then. I’d hit it and the problems that previously appeared to need fixed, would seem to resolve themselves without working on them directly.
Well there is a reset button. I’m sharing it with you. I use it in my own tough times. It involves ten irreplaceable perspectives. They get me back on course faster, easier and more authentically than using my logic or sheer will power.
You may be familiar with them or they may seem game-changing. Regardless, the best question you can ask yourself is “how can I fully use and apply these in my life and work today? ”
1. There are no coincidences. Everything is happening for a reason to support us in becoming the best version of ourselves. Look at the difficult experience today for what it really is –the salt that rubs the oyster so it can become the pearl it was destined to be. It can be really tough in difficult moments to own this, but it also opens us to breakthroughs. What’s happening to you, is happening for you. Ask yourself, “How is this here to support where I’m going?”
2. You are EXACTLY where you’re supposed to be. Stop telling yourself you are behind. Comparing ourselves to others is a common way we use to tell ourselves we are not where we’re supposed to be. It’s also a sure-fire way to stay stuck because it brings down our ability to see what is great about ourselves.
Have you ever felt inspired after a healthy dose of comparison and self-criticism? Probably not. We can’t write a new chapter when we keep re-reading the old chapter or being in a fight with the current one. The only person you should try to be better than is the person you were yesterday. Keep your eyes on the life and body of work you’re creating. Let others work on theirs.
3. You are more brilliant than you give yourself credit for. Don’t wait for another to tell you who you are. Or that they like what you’re saying or that you’re awesome. You are unique. You have gifts. You are loved. You deserve and are capable of a great life. Choose you. Own how magnificent you truly are.
Unless you make the decision that who you are, your contribution and what you offer or do is valuable, no amount of time or work driving to your fullest potential will make a difference.
4. You don’t need “it” to be happy. Happiness is a state and you can change your state in seconds. I’ve witnessed a person move from a suicidal state to joy in less than a minute. Take responsibility for your happiness rather than thinking someone else or material items, titles, adulation and power will do it for you. They may provide a temporary high or rush. The problem is when we lose the high, we need more of the drug (external things) to fill the addiction. Happiness does not require a thing. It’s an internal experience. Celebrate your progress. Enjoy the journey.
5. Your life is a direct reflection of your thinking. (Your story). You create what you believe not what you wish. The same that’s true for food is true with thoughts: you’ve got to put something good in to get something good out. Be deliberate and conscious of the beliefs and thoughts you feed yourself. Your thoughts and feelings are the only things you have complete choice over.
6. You must be willing to put yourself in the spotlight and show your brilliance. If you want to reach your potential and make the positive impact in YOUR world and THE world, putting yourself in the spotlight is exactly what you must do. Be willing to be exposed and seen.
Vulnerability is the new strong. It requires unhooking from other’s praise as well as their criticism. Yes, being vulnerable does mean that we will go through the discomfort and pain of being uncertain or even rejected. Everybody does. That’s a requirement to a life Played Full Out. Breathe in and make peace with that now.
7. You can have it all based on what matters most to you. For most of us it’s unlikely we can be a brain surgeon, but do you want to be? Probably not. I believe, if you have a desire, you also are given the ability –if willing to do the work–to make it come true. We all have more resources than we realize. You must find the place inside yourself where nothing is impossible.
8. It’s your responsibility to know who you are and become the best version of you. If it was all about us, we wouldn’t have been born with 6 billion other people on this planet. We are each charged to know who we are and share our gifts, live fully, bring our A-game and make a difference in this world doing what we love. It’s not a “should.” It’s a must. It’s time to accept that charge. You are the hero of your own life. Give yourself permission to play full out in work and life…and to make mistakes. That’s the only way anything great was ever born.
9. Getting the life you want begins with loving the life you have. Loving our life is a choice–not a fact. Gratitude has been proven to change our frequency and attract more of what we love. What we focus on expands. You can’t be depressed and grateful at the same time.
After my father-in-law’s death, a really tough time in my family’s life, I realized that every day, I have a choice to find evidence of why my life is awful or why I am the luckiest person in the world. Ever since then, I’ve chosen the latter. It’s a powerful choice we all have. This choice determines our destiny. Begin and end your day with gratitude—especially in the tough times. It retrains the brain to expect and look for more goodness.
10. This time is the right time. Life is temporary. It’s a terminal condition for us all. Death is a great motivator for living. Every time I hear of a person dying, I am reminded to get on with living. Our greatest gift is the present. It’s all we have. Choose NOW to start (or get back up and continue) on whatever you’re being called towards. Some complain that it will take five years to create it. My response is that you’re either going to hit that age and have done it, or be that age and still want it. Which do you choose? Begin now.
When we reset and lead from these paradigm shifts, we change our state, how we feel, our thoughts, our focus and our ability to unleash our potential. They are the foundation to the present and future we desire.
Take a breath. Reset. Give yourself a hug. The world needs YOU to dust off, stand up and keep going!